If you depend upon others for your success, you are doomed to a life of failure and despair.

It is a sad fact of life that few people consistently deliver what they promise. Instead of lamenting what someone else should have done to help you, focus on what you can do to help yourself. The best plan of action is one that provides opportunities for others to benefit if they wish to work with you toward the accomplishment of your goals but that does not depend upon these people for success.

Never mind what others didn’t do. It’s what you do that counts.

It’s called a “self-fulfilling prophecy” when something occurs because we believe it will. The mind is constructed so that it constantly seeks to bring into physical reality the things it thinks about most. Most of us will never realize the tremendous potential we possess — because we are unwilling to believe that we can accomplish things that others believe are impossible.

“Impossible” jobs require more effort and greater concentration, but when they are completed, the rewards — both financial and psychic — are commensurate with the effort required. You may not be able to achieve everything you’d like, but you won’t accomplish anything unless you believe you can.

It’s true: money can’t buy happiness. Happiness is found in doing — not merely in possessing.

Most of us are motivated by aspirations of the lifestyle we desire for ourselves and our families, not by the physical possessions — homes, vacations, automobiles, etc. When you recognize this fact, you will know that you must constantly “raise the bar” to encourage yourself to reach higher goals.

Your goals should include the possessions that you desire, but as former Apple Computer chairman and CEO John Sculley said, “Success is a journey, not a destination. Make sure you enjoy the trip.”

Have you ever felt that sometimes you are your own worst enemy? No one can keep you down but yourself.

We all have moments when, no matter how hard we try, things just don’t seem to work out right, when everything goes wrong, and we have no one to blame but ourselves. But, just as you may sometimes be your own worst enemy, you can also be your own best friend. The transition usually occurs when you realize that the only person on earth who can determine your failure or success is you yourself.

You may discover your best friend when you develop the maturity and strength of character to accept yourself for the person you are and to take the actions necessary to become the person you wish to be. When you analyze yourself objectively, you can begin to build upon your strengths and compensate for your weaknesses. When you do, you will realize that the only person who stands in the way of your success is you.

Change your mental attitude, and the world around you will change accordingly. One sound idea is all that one needs to achieve success.

Your world will become what you choose to make it. You can reach great heights of success, or you can settle for a miserable life that is devoid of hope. The choice is yours.

When you choose a positive course, you set in motion an unstoppable force that will allow you to have a fulfilling career, the love of your family and friends, good physical and mental health, and all of the other true riches of life. To change your world, you must change it from the inside out. You must begin with yourself. When you choose the course that puts your life on a positive track, you will change your life for the better, and you will also positively influence the people with whom you come in contact.

The two kinds of people who never get ahead are those who will not do what they are told and those who do only what they are told.

It’s hard to say which would be more discouraging: drifting from job to job because you’re always the first to be laid off, or laboring in monotonous obscurity at the same job. The first results from not doing what you are told to do, the second from doing only what you are told to do. You can “get by” for a time following either approach, but you will never get ahead.

Personal initiative is more important in today’s enlightened, high-tech workplace than it was during the Industrial Age, when the ability to follow orders was a critical skill. As technology makes many supervisory functions obsolete, every one of us is expected to do more with less, determine what needs to be done, and do it. Don’t wait to be told. Know your company and your job so well that you can anticipate what needs to be done — then do it! Stop explaining and start doing!

The first question to ask yourself is – What am I trying to do with my life – Do I know my lifes Purpose?

Chances are very good that is you have a fast answer to this question….making decisions is easier for you.

When life throws an issue at you and you must make a choice, ask yourself how each choice affects your life’s purpose?  This process typically makes it easier to know the right decision.

For example, if your lifes purpose is to be a great parent …. decision making should get easier since every choice would be based on what is best for your family.

On the flip side, living without a definite major purpose promises nothing but a scant living. You may get by in life without a Definite Major Purpose, but you will never get ahead. Definiteness of purpose is the starting point of all achievement. Financial goals in particular should be specific, definite, and measurable. You should know what you plan to earn, by when, and how you plan to do so.

The greatest advantage of financial security is the peace of mind that comes from knowing that, whatever challenges life brings, you are equipped to deal with them. You will be better at whatever you choose to do because you can focus on opportunities instead of struggling to eke out a living.

People of character do what they say they will do, when they say they will do it, and according to agreed-upon conditions.

They are the leaders, the individuals to whom others turn for guidance, because they have demonstrated that they care, that they can be trusted. If you respect yourself enough to keep commitments even when it’s inconvenient to do so, others will come to respect you too.

Dependability, like any other character trait, is a habit. Begin today to develop the dependability habit. If you procrastinate or find it difficult to meet your commitments, start small. Promise yourself that you will be on time, for example, and manage your time so that you are. Soon you will find that it’s easier to keep other commitments as well.

Dependability is the first foundation stone of good character.

There’s an old folk song about a thirsty traveler who comes across a pump in the desert. An attached note explains that there’s a jar of water buried nearby to prime the pump. You’ve got to give before you get, the note says. It is up to the traveler to decide whether to drink the water from the jar or take a chance that the small amount of water invested will result in an unlimited supply of cold, clear water.

So it is with going the extra mile. You’ve got to give before you get. You cannot expect to receive generous rewards and then decide what to give in return. You must give freely and have faith that the rewards will eventually come. As clergyman Frank Crain once said, “You may be deceived if you trust too much, but you will live in torment if you do not trust enough.”

Start going the extra mile and opportunity will follow you.

Going the extra mile can give you insight and a good reputation, both of which attract opportunity. Many obvious opportunities are found in places no one else has bothered to venture.

If you put in the extra effort to make a good project an even better one, or you get to know your equipment better than anyone else on your shift, you will see things others overlook and be in a position to make use of them. Leaders who need a job done think first of people they know who will do it well. If other people respect you for the quantity and the quality of your work, you will find yourself advancing past others who regard their jobs as drudgery. For all the extra service that you’ve rendered, you’ll find yourself more than amply compensated by opportunities others never grasp.

It is possible to go through life without ever accepting any responsibility, but such freedom from the cares of the world comes at an enormous financial cost. If you make it a practice to go out the back door when responsibility walks through the front, you will also miss out on the opportunities that always accompany responsibility. In almost any vocation, profession, or calling, your remuneration is directly proportional to the responsibility that accompanies your position.

Make it a practice to volunteer for more responsibility or simply to assume it. There are times when you must get on with the task at hand without ever being formally told you’re in charge of it. If you demonstrate that you are a can-do kind of person, responsibility and the higher pay that accompanies it will come to you.

Please remember, big pay and little responsibility are circumstances seldom found together…..Start 2014 off Right!

Have you noticed that Ordinary people who do Extra-Ordinary things for others are those we later call heroes.

When asked why they performed as they did, they often say, “It was nothing anyone else wouldn’t have done in the circumstances.” Perhaps that’s their way of saying we all have the capacity for greatness.

It is only when we are severely tested that we rise to the occasion and perform at the highest levels of our competence.

Doing the right things is an easy action when we have created the habit of doing the right thing. If we make it a practice to take the appropriate action even when it seems unimportant and insignificant, we will do the right thing — without thinking — in important situations. If we let our actions speak for us, we will never have to worry about others recognizing our contribution.

If through some terrible, unforeseen tragedy you should die tomorrow, how would your epitaph read? What would others remember about you?

In the final analysis, you will be remembered for your good works, not for the money you have accumulated during your lifetime. Your wealth may be little more than the cause for disagreements among your heirs, while your good deeds will be remembered long after you are gone. As you accumulate wealth, devote a portion of your money and your time to causes that benefit those less fortunate than you.

If you think you can buy your way into heaven with money alone, you may regret that you didn’t convert it into good deeds instead.

Just ask . . . What would your Hero DO! #TheMatterMeter

It’s difficult to remember in the heat of a disagreement that it takes two to quarrel.  You choose either conflict or peace.

When others are upset with you or with a situation that involves you, let them know that you understand how they feel. Try examining the problem from their point of view.

– What is the source of the conflict?
– How could it be resolved in a manner that would satisfy the interests of all involved?
– How have you contributed to the problem?

When you try to find solutions instead of attempting to affix blame, others will almost always respond in kind.

Discord in any relationship often has unpleasant financial implications, but it is far costlier in human terms.

When you are involved in a fractious relationship, physical and mental energy that could be directed toward positive achievements is dissipated needlessly, squandered upon stressful, unproductive activities. Unfortunately, whatever the cause of friction between individuals, it adversely affects each person involved.

When you find yourself in a contentious relationship, there are few acceptable alternatives. You can work out your problems or leave. Only you know which is the best solution for you, but if you objectively evaluate your reasons for becoming involved and find that they are still valid, your best course of action may be to swallow your pride and find a solution that is acceptable to everyone involved. If you cannot do this, perhaps it’s time to get out of the partnership and find another course toward your objective.

Friction in machinery costs money. Friction in human relationships impoverishes both the spirit and the bank account.

It takes more than a loud voice to gain respect for authority.

Margaret Thatcher once observed that being powerful is like being a lady: if you have to tell others you are, you aren’t. Truly great leaders gain respect by the way they conduct themselves, not by the loudness of their orders. You gain respect by respecting others.

Follow the Golden Rule in your treatment of others, and you will win their undying loyalty. If you ever expect to have authority over others, you must first prove yourself worthy.

The world stands aside and makes room for the person who knows where he is going and is on his way.

When you have a vision for what you wish to achieve in your life, not only will others stand aside and let you pass, but they will join you in your quest as well. They will instinctively recognize your enthusiasm and zest for living.

When you speak of your passion in life, your definite major goal, they will see the intensity of your desire, and they will respond with encouragement and assistance or they will stand aside. It will be apparent to all who know you that you will succeed.

Knowledge is only potential power. It becomes power only when, and if, it is organized into definite plans of action and directed to a definite end. Boastfulness is generally an admission of an inferiority complex.

Enthusiasm is contagious, and the person who has it, under control, is generally welcome in any group of people.

If you don’t believe it yourself, don’t ask anyone else to do so.

It is virtually impossible not to transmit your doubts and insecurities to others through body language, tone of voice, inflection, word choice, and other subtle characteristics. When you show threw your actions that you lack self-confidence, other people will  doubt your ability to perform. You can gain the respect and confidence of others.

Begin by making a list of all the things you like about yourself and the things you would like to change. Make a conscious effort to build upon your positive strengths and correct your weaknesses. Weak desires bring weak results, just as a small amount of fire makes a small amount of heat. It may not be easy, but if you assess yourself objectively and persevere in your efforts, you will eventually prevail.

A good fisherman goes out of his way to bait his hook with what the fish prefer — which might not be a bad tip for those who wish to succeed in human relationships.

Just as in a conversation it’s a good idea to listen more than you talk, it is also wise in relationships to think about the well-being of others more than you think about your own wishes and desires. When you constantly strive to treat others in the same way you would like them to treat you, you become a person whom others like to be around, one who commands their respect, confidence, and loyalty. When you learn to manage emotions and your ego, and when you learn to always consider the needs and desires of others, it is inevitable that you will “bait your hook” with kindness and consideration, and catch more friends than you can count.