Jan 11, 2019 - Matter of Patience    Comments Off on When you are Down, only UP is left

When you are Down, only UP is left

It isn’t defeat, but rather your mental attitude toward it, that whips you.

Defeat is NOT permanent unless you allow it to be so. When you have a positive attitude, you will recognize failure for the impostor that it is and realize that it is really a learning experience, a valuable lesson that will help you succeed with the next attempt.

Ask yourself: What could I have done differently that would have altered the outcome? What can I do in the future to minimize problems and mistakes? What did I learn from this experience that I can put to good use next time? If you approach obstacles and setbacks with a positive attitude, you will be surprised how quickly you can turn defeat into victory.

There always remains an opportunity to make a new start.

successupThough it may not seem so when you first encounter a serious blow, you can never lose two of the most important assets you have – the power of your mind and your freedom to use it. Once you have turned them to understanding what laid you low, you can begin forming new plans.

You may not have the money you once had; you may lack the allies you had cultivated. But you still have the benefit of a universe that eventually rewards honest effort, as well as gaining the experience of mistakes you will never make again.

Remember, no matter where you are now, whatever you can conceive and believe, you can achieve.

Dec 24, 2018 - Matter of Action    Comments Off on It Takes 2 to Fight . . .

It Takes 2 to Fight . . .

It’s difficult to remember in the heat of a disagreement that it takes two to quarrel.  You choose either conflict or peace.

Change how you look at the problemWhen others are upset with you or with a situation that involves you, let them know that you understand how they feel. Try examining the problem from their point of view.

– What is the source of the conflict?
– How could it be resolved in a manner that would satisfy the interests of all involved?
– How have you contributed to the problem?

When you try to find solutions instead of attempting to affix blame, others will almost always respond in kind.

It takes 2 to fightDiscord in any relationship often has unpleasant financial implications, but it is far costlier in human terms.

When you are involved in a fractious relationship, physical and mental energy that could be directed toward positive achievements is dissipated needlessly, squandered upon stressful, unproductive activities. Unfortunately, whatever the cause of friction between individuals, it adversely affects each person involved.

When you find yourself in a contentious relationship, there are few acceptable alternatives. You can work out your problems or leave. Only you know which is the best solution for you, but if you objectively evaluate your reasons for becoming involved and find that they are still valid, your best course of action may be to swallow your pride and find a solution that is acceptable to everyone involved. If you cannot do this, perhaps it’s time to get out of the partnership and find another course toward your objective.

Friction in machinery costs money. Friction in human relationships impoverishes both the spirit and the bank account.

Nov 24, 2018 - Matter of Importance    Comments Off on Do you have REAL Friends?

Do you have REAL Friends?

There is nothing like money to make you attractive and appealing to others.

dogcatdogsBut, of course, the kind of people who are attracted to you only because of what you can do for them may be acquaintances, not friends. You may have many acquaintances if you become wealthy, but whatever your station in life may be, you will never have true friends unless you are a friend to others. Be very selective in your choice of friends. Choose to associate with positive people who like you for the person you are, who encourage you to be yourself and to be the best you can be.

If you wish “acquaintanceship,” be rich. If you wish friends, be a friend.

When faced with a conflict between others, most of us are more inclined to walk away from the situation than to become involved. If we do allow ourselves to become a participant, it is usually by adopting the position of one at the expense

Shark-circling-islandof the other. Of course, such behavior does little to resolve the dispute and may in fact exacerbate the problem.

But when you make a genuine attempt to help resolve the situation, you should not be surprised if you’re the only one. We are all complex individuals with feelings and emotions we often don’t fully understand. Sometimes the mere involvement of a disinterested party is enough to help resolve the dispute. Make sure, though, if you are the one in the middle that you don’t allow yourself to get into a position where you must choose between the desires of one person over the other. Work toward a compromise that best suits everyone’s interests.

If you must meddle in human relationships, try to be a peacemaker. You will find that you don’t have much competition.

Nov 10, 2018 - Matter of Focus    Comments Off on Want the secret to Success?

Want the secret to Success?

There is always a shortage of people who get the job done on time without excuses or grumbling. Competent people always get chosen first!

If you really study those who have reached the top of any organization, you will find that they are the people who cheerfully accept challenges, take the initiative, and get the job done. They don’t complain, and they don’t make excuses.

Those who never get anywhere in their jobs and careers can’t seem to understand that achievers don’t become achievers after they reach the top. They reached the top because of the way they conducted themselves along the way.

You can easily become one of those individuals who regularly advance in the organization — if you are willing to pay the price. Any good manager will tell you that the type of people who are most in demand are those who can think for themselves, who will take the initiative to do the right thing without being told, and who will stick to the job until it is finished.

You can be one of these people if you choose to be.

Nov 9, 2018 - What is the Matter?    Comments Off on You never forget the truth, tell it!

You never forget the truth, tell it!

By all means tell the world how good you are — but share the credit and reserve the blame.

You should let others know of your achievements, with these provisions: Do it with your actions first and make sure you share the credit with others who helped you along the way.

A fundamental principle of leadership that has not changed over the centuries is: Share the credit for success with others, but take the blame for failures alone.

It is virtually impossible to conceal the truth forever. It is the natural order of things that the truth will eventually come out. This single fact is the foundation of our judicial system and the basis on which all human relationships are formed. A business, professional, or personal bigbrotherrelationship built upon a lie cannot long endure, but one that is founded on truth and equality of benefit for the participants is unlimited.

Make it a practice to tell the truth in all that you do — even when it doesn’t matter — and you will form a habit of truthfulness. You will know instinctively that it is better to tell the truth and face the consequences than to launch a falsehood that will eventually make itself known to the world.

Oct 25, 2018 - Matter of Time    Comments Off on If today was your last?

If today was your last?

How would you spend your last Day? Who would it be with?

Why not do this today?

When we live each day as if it were your last, and we develop a keen respect for opportunity. If you had only one more day on this earth, how much sharper your senses would be.

The beauty of nature, the simple pleasures of life, would be indescribably wonderful, and every moment would present an opportunity to spend quality time with your family and strengthen relationships with friends, acquaintances, and business associates. Every thought would be laser-sharp in that highly focused state.

Well, today is the last day on earth for today’s opportunities. Don’t let them pass you by.

Act as IF what you wanted IS happening and see how different life looks!

http://www.themattermeter.com/?p=338

Oct 24, 2018 - Matter of Perspective    Comments Off on Monday-morning quarterback?

Monday-morning quarterback?

The greatest of all success rules is this: do unto others as you would if you were the others.

How often do you look at those around you and say, “I could do any of their jobs better than they can if I only had the opportunity,” never realizing the price they have paid and the knowledge they have accumulated to earn the right to hold that position?

It’s easy to be a Monday-morning quarterback and second-guess the actions of others. But it’s far more productive to recognize the contributions of others and give them the credit for a job well done. If you aspire to a higher level of recognition, demonstrate to others — your peers as well as your superiors — that you can be counted upon. The world’s greatest rewards accrue to those who always deliver on their promises.

The moral is – Don’t covet the other fellow’s job if you are not prepared to accept the responsibility that goes with it.

By using the Golden Rule as a principle of ethical behavior; we have a dynamic force that can work good into our lives. When you make it a practice to treat others as though you were the others, you spread goodwill among people who, in turn, may be moved to do the same. By their actions, they influence still more people, who generate goodwill among even more people.

This force for goodwill increases exponentially and will return to you from totally new sources. The benefit you receive from a good deed performed today by a total stranger may have been a chain reaction from long ago when you observed the Golden Rule in your own dealings with another.

Oct 17, 2018 - Matter of Perspective    Comments Off on Value by Perspective!

Value by Perspective!

Waste no words on a man who dislikes you. Actions are the only thing that will change their perspective.

bag-over-head-embarrassed-shame-businessmanSome people think they can talk their way out of any situation, and for a time they may be right. But, if someone already dislikes you, whether from misunderstanding or an error you have made, he or she will be especially difficult to persuade with words. Their emotions will always get in the way of their ability to think logically and reasonably. And words will make the situation worse.

The only true way to alter another persons perspective is through your action. The value of someones perspective must be changed.  We all frame things is life to make is easier to function. IE,The sky is blue unless it rains when its grey.  Oh today the sky is grey, must be its going to rain.

Consistent actions over a sustained period of time, are the only way a persons perspective of you can be persuaded differently. If you constantly demonstrate that you are a generous, kind, trustworthy and caring person, it will be very hard for even your enemies to dislike you.

Persuading yourself that you can do something differently is a strong beginning. The longer you delay, the harder it will be to begin. Seldom is a plan perfect. If you have a clear vision of your goal and a plan that is flexible enough to allow you to deal with unexpected obstacles or take advantage of unforeseen opportunities, don’t delay another minute.

Just getting into action — even if you do have to make adjustments later — will help focus your mind and channel your energies in the direction of your objective.

Even if the original person cannot see your changes….you will become a better and happier person for having made the effort.

 

Sep 2, 2018 - Matter of Perspective, No Matter How    Comments Off on Mistakes repeat until we learn!

Mistakes repeat until we learn!

There’s an old adage that those who refuse to learn from history are doomed to repeat it. So it is with our failures.

 Unless we learn from our mistakes, we are likely to repeat them until we learn from such experiences and correct our course — or give up and accept temporary defeat as permanent failure. Every setback you encounter in life contains valuable information that, if you study it carefully, will eventually lead you to success.

Without adversity, you would never develop wisdom, and without wisdom, success would be short-lived indeed. When you make a mistake, say, “That’s good! I’ve gotten that out of the way. I will never do that again.” You will no doubt make other mistakes, but they won’t bother you nearly as much when you treat them as learning experiences.

If you don’t know why you failed, you are no wiser than when you began.

One of the most common mistakes is making excuses to explain why we do not succeed. Unfortunately, the vast majority of people in the world — those who do not succeed — are excuse-makers. They try to explain their action, or inaction, with words.

When you succeed, accept the congratulations of others with good grace; when you fail, take responsibility for your actions, learn from your mistakes, and move on to more constructive things.

When your actions are appropriate in every circumstance, you will never feel the need to explain them with words. Your actions will say all that needs to be said.

 

Aug 21, 2018 - No Matter How    Comments Off on There are no degrees of honesty!

There are no degrees of honesty!

The person who is honest only for a “price” should be rated as dishonest.

cyber-thiefThere are no degrees of honesty. There are only absolutes. Either you are honest or you are not. Honesty does not come for a price; honesty is its own reward. It’s also the most efficient form of human behavior. Honest persons never have to worry about which lie they have told to whom, and they never have to worry about getting caught. Thus, they are free to focus all their energies on more productive things.

Make it a habit to be honest in all your dealings. If you can’t be truthful in what you say, don’t say anything at all. Remember, small lies start out innocently enough but soon assume lives of their own. A small lie requires a larger one to conceal it, and soon more, even larger lies are required. Don’t tell that first lie or take a single thing that doesn’t belong to you, and you’ll never have to worry.

You cannot succeed in life by scattering your forces and trying to do a dozen things at the same time.