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Sep 16, 2018 - No Matter How    Comments Off on Integrity Matters . . .

Integrity Matters . . .

One of life’s greatest joys is the sense of wonder that accompanies the arrival of a tiny new human being into the world. But that joy is accompanied by a tremendous responsibility and personal integrity…..now someone IS watching.

It is so easy to forget that the world around us watches our every move – mirroring the good and bad we do.

This process really shows itself in the growth of our children.  We can provide them with all the physical advantages of a good childhood, but unless we the parents strive to set a good example for them to follow, there is a high probability they will drift through life without purpose.

By living a life of integrity whether we think anyone is watching or not, we live exemplary behavior. All those around us will benefit by the great example and we will draw too us all that we wish for a joyous life.

However, taking ethical shortcuts, either big or small, without other people observing them and assuming that this behavior is something you wouldn’t mind having turned back on yourself.

Certainly we all make mistakes, but if you have always striven for the best course, others will remember it and treat you accordingly.

Sep 14, 2018 - What is the Matter?    Comments Off on What is your State of Mind?

What is your State of Mind?

Those who are quick to see their limitations generally are slow in seeing their opportunities.

stateofmindMovie producer Michael Todd once said, “Being broke is temporary; being poor is a state of mind.” So it is with opportunity. Whether you see opportunities or limitations is entirely within your control. How you view the world is a reflection of your mental attitude.

If you focus on your inadequacies, you will be plagued by fear, doubt, and failure, but when you focus on your strengths, you will find courage, confidence, and success. Self-confidence can replace self-doubt only by deliberate, planned effort. When you start to doubt your capabilities, pause to review your previous accomplishments. Identify every experience that might be helpful to you in your present situation. When you apply the knowledge and wisdom you have accumulated, there are few limitations that you cannot overcome.

Your real courage shows best in the hour of adversity.

Some setbacks are so severe that to give in to them means losing the whole ball game. When he assumed command of the Korean War, Gen. Matthew Ridgeway found his forces pushed far to the south, hard pressed by the invaders. Only a determined decision to hold the lines allowed the American forces to keep from being swept into the sea and to eventually regain all the territory they had lost.

liontrustWhen a defeat strikes, you may not have the time to withdraw and contemplate your mistakes without risking further setbacks. Don’t succumb to paralysis. It is important to know at that moment what it is you truly desire and to act to preserve your resources and your hope. If you crumble utterly, you will take a blow to your self-esteem that will be hard to repair. Instead, stick to your principles, and you will know, at the very least, that you have protected the most important thing you have. Your successes in life will far outnumber your failures.

Sep 11, 2018 - Matter of Action    Comments Off on Do You Believe?

Do You Believe?

If you don’t believe it yourself, don’t ask anyone else to do so.

telephathyIt is virtually impossible not to transmit your doubts and insecurities to others through body language, tone of voice, inflection, word choice, and other subtle characteristics. When you show threw your actions that you lack self-confidence, other people will  doubt your ability to perform. You can gain the respect and confidence of others.

Begin by making a list of all the things you like about yourself and the things you would like to change. Make a conscious effort to build upon your positive strengths and correct your weaknesses. Weak desires bring weak results, just as a small amount of fire makes a small amount of heat. It may not be easy, but if you assess yourself objectively and persevere in your efforts, you will eventually prevail.

A good fisherman goes out of his way to bait his hook with what the fish prefer — which might not be a bad tip for those who wish to succeed in human relationships.

dog_fishJust as in a conversation it’s a good idea to listen more than you talk, it is also wise in relationships to think about the well-being of others more than you think about your own wishes and desires. When you constantly strive to treat others in the same way you would like them to treat you, you become a person whom others like to be around, one who commands their respect, confidence, and loyalty. When you learn to manage emotions and your ego, and when you learn to always consider the needs and desires of others, it is inevitable that you will “bait your hook” with kindness and consideration, and catch more friends than you can count.

Sep 9, 2018 - Matter of Importance    Comments Off on Life’s greatest gifts!

Life’s greatest gifts!

Most of us are incapable of “going it alone.” All enduring success is founded upon harmonious human relationships.

joy of othersWhether it is in our careers, in our personal relationships, or in life, we all need others if we are to achieve the level of success we desire. Besides, what’s the point of having it all if we have no one we care about to share it?

You may choose to work with others, you may ignore them, or you may choose to work against them, but the greatest successes in life come to those who work harmoniously with others. When your personal goals coincide with those of another, not only does the power of your combined labors benefit you, but such cooperation also creates a synergistic effect that allows you to achieve far more than the simple sum of your individual efforts.

Know that friendship freely given and gratefully received is one of life’s greatest gifts.

Experts in negotiation handle the process so smoothly that discussions hardly seem like negotiations at all. While the word negotiation itself conjures up visions of cigar-chomping adversaries pounding the table to emphasize their demands, the best results are achieved when all the parties involved are able to put themselves in the others’ shoes and arrive at an agreement that is beneficial to everyone involved.

Whether you are negotiating a higher salary, a new job, or the acquisition of a company, your chances of success are far greater when you approach the situation positively and with a clear objective in mind. It also helps to understand the motives of others involved and to have in-depth knowledge of the subject under discussion. Finally, approach every topic with an open mind — don’t simply try to bully others into accepting your proposal or point of view.

The most important job is that of learning how to negotiate with others without friction.

Sep 8, 2018 - No Matter How    Comments Off on What Helen Keller taught us!

What Helen Keller taught us!

The life of Helen Keller is an outstanding example of the triumph of the human spirit over a physical handicap.

hellen-kellerEven today, decades after her death, her life stands as a beacon of hope for those who must constantly struggle just to perform routine tasks that most of us take for granted. Whenever you feel fate has been unkind to you, all you must do is look around you and you will begin to appreciate how fortunate you are. Make sure your life’s plan includes giving something back to the community without expecting anything in return. Giving time and effort, not just money, reinforces your connections to your community, provides you with concrete proof of the effectiveness of deliberate action, and reminds you of the inspiring power of determination in human endeavor.

blank epitaphAlfred Nobel had an opportunity afforded to very few. When his brother died, the newspaper confused the two and published Alfred’s obituary instead of his brother’s. As he read his own obituary, Alfred realized that the world would remember him for his invention of dynamite — an instrument of destruction. It was because of that experience that he decided to fund the Nobel Prizes. Today, most of the world knows his name in connection with humankind’s greatest achievements. Good deeds live on in the minds of others. When you do a kindness for someone else, you set in motion a force for good that will remain long after you’re gone.

It’s not the epitaph on your tombstone but the record of your deeds that may perpetuate your name after death.

Sep 7, 2018 - Matter of Action    Comments Off on It takes more than a loud voice!

It takes more than a loud voice!

It takes more than a loud voice to gain respect for authority.

Margaret Thatcher once observed that being powerful is like being a lady: if you have to tell others you are, you aren’t. Truly great leaders gain respect by the way they conduct themselves, not by the loudness of their orders. You gain respect by respecting others.

Follow the Golden Rule in your treatment of others, and you will win their undying loyalty. If you ever expect to have authority over others, you must first prove yourself worthy.

The world stands aside and makes room for the person who knows where he is going and is on his way.

When you have a vision for what you wish to achieve in your life, not only will others stand aside and let you pass, but they will join you in your quest as well. They will instinctively recognize your enthusiasm and zest for living.

When you speak of your passion in life, your definite major goal, they will see the intensity of your desire, and they will respond with encouragement and assistance or they will stand aside. It will be apparent to all who know you that you will succeed.

Knowledge is only potential power. It becomes power only when, and if, it is organized into definite plans of action and directed to a definite end. Boastfulness is generally an admission of an inferiority complex.

Enthusiasm is contagious, and the person who has it, under control, is generally welcome in any group of people.

Sep 4, 2018 - What is the Matter?    Comments Off on Be Careful…Worry makes it Worse!

Be Careful…Worry makes it Worse!

There are few things in life that are as bad as they seem at first.

Dealing with adversity begins with analyzing and accepting your situation for what it is. When you realize that things are not nearly as bad as they might have been, you have taken the first step toward working your way through the problem. It is a truism that you will never be asked to carry a heavier load than you can bear, but it sometimes helps you better appreciate that fact if you volunteer some of your time to help those who are less fortunate than you are.

When adversity overtakes you, it pays to be thankful it was not worse instead of worrying over your misfortune.

The only constraints that you have on your income and advancement potential are those you place upon yourself. If you don’t like your position, or if you are unhappy with your salary, do something about it.

–What can you do to make yourself more valuable to your department or your company?

–What tasks have not been completed because no one has the time or the inclination to take care of them?

Look around and identify things that need to be done. Don’t wait to be asked. If you make it a habit to seek out opportunities, to take on new tasks, you will increase your knowledge about the organization and become such a valued employee that your company can’t afford to lose you.

Sep 2, 2018 - Matter of Perspective, No Matter How    Comments Off on Mistakes repeat until we learn!

Mistakes repeat until we learn!

There’s an old adage that those who refuse to learn from history are doomed to repeat it. So it is with our failures.

 Unless we learn from our mistakes, we are likely to repeat them until we learn from such experiences and correct our course — or give up and accept temporary defeat as permanent failure. Every setback you encounter in life contains valuable information that, if you study it carefully, will eventually lead you to success.

Without adversity, you would never develop wisdom, and without wisdom, success would be short-lived indeed. When you make a mistake, say, “That’s good! I’ve gotten that out of the way. I will never do that again.” You will no doubt make other mistakes, but they won’t bother you nearly as much when you treat them as learning experiences.

If you don’t know why you failed, you are no wiser than when you began.

One of the most common mistakes is making excuses to explain why we do not succeed. Unfortunately, the vast majority of people in the world — those who do not succeed — are excuse-makers. They try to explain their action, or inaction, with words.

When you succeed, accept the congratulations of others with good grace; when you fail, take responsibility for your actions, learn from your mistakes, and move on to more constructive things.

When your actions are appropriate in every circumstance, you will never feel the need to explain them with words. Your actions will say all that needs to be said.

 

Aug 30, 2018 - What is the Matter?    Comments Off on Opportunity or Gift?

Opportunity or Gift?

Opportunities are never just handed to you; they must be created.  This is why we call items given to us – Gifts!

Easy Money is a gift not opportunityOpportunities abound for every individual in every walk of life. They may not be the opportunities that you prefer, but each opportunity of which you take advantage leads to bigger and better opportunities.

Physical and mental handicaps may mean that you have to explore territories unknown to others, but they also mean you have opportunities those others will never find. Think of Stephen Hawking’s brilliant research on the nature of the universe despite the fact that a crippling disease makes writing and speaking, as we know it, impossible for him.

Those who approach their jobs and careers with enthusiasm always find plenty of opportunities, while those who complain about no one ever giving them a chance are merely observers of life.

When you are determined that you will not allow others to determine your future for you, when you refuse to allow temporary setbacks to defeat you, you are destined for great success. The opportunities will always be there for you.

If there are adversities that you cannot overcome right now, remember to capitalize upon them at a later date by looking for the seed of an equivalent or greater benefit.

If the thing you wish to do is right, and you believe in it, go ahead and do it! Put your dream across, and never mind what “they” say if you meet with temporary defeat, for “they,” perhaps, do not know that every failure brings with it the seed of an equivalent success.

Aug 28, 2018 - Mind over Matter    Comments Off on Challenge is your best teacher . . .

Challenge is your best teacher . . .

Most successful people find opportunities in their adversity… if you can see the lessons in the moment you will be way ahead of average.

leader-rolemodelSamuel Johnson once observed that the prospect of being hanged wonderfully focuses the mind. You yourself may have found that your mind seems sharpest when you are faced with the greatest difficulties. Desperation often proves you really are better than you think. But with the exception of an immediate threat to your life or health, there are few situations that require instantaneous action. When the world seems to be conspiring against you and nothing is working out right, pause for a few moments to think the situation through — then develop the most appropriate plan of action, the one that has the greatest likelihood of success.

The other fellow’s mistakes are a weak alibi for your own.

quote-it-is-easy-in-the-world-to-live-after-the-world-s-opinion-it-is-easy-in-solitude-after-our-own-ralph-waldo-emersonRalph Waldo Emerson said: “It is easy in the world to live after the world’s opinion; it is easy in solitude to live after our own; but the great man is he who in the midst of the crowd keeps with perfect sweetness the independence of solitude.”

It’s easy when you are part of a group to “go along to get along,” but when you are able to maintain your own highest standards of integrity — regardless of what others may do — you are destined for greatness. When you have developed a carefully thought out code of personal conduct, you will never have to ask anyone else what the appropriate course of action should be. You will intuitively know.

Most great leaders began in the capacity of followers. They became great leaders because they were intelligent followers.

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