If you must let someone down, be sure it isn’t the friend who helped you up when you were down.

We all have short memories. We become preoccupied with our own interests and daily cares, and it’s easy to lose track of friends. There will always be times when you must choose between what you wish to do and what you must do.

When you are faced with such decisions, make sure you always remember those true and loyal friends who were there when you needed them, and never, under any circumstances, abandon them.

When you let down a friend who helped you when you needed it most, you will not only adversely affect the friendship; you will seriously damage your own self-respect. When you fail a friend, regardless of how heavy your own burdens may be, you also fail yourself. If you absolutely cannot do what good friends would like, find another way to make it up to them.

The safest and best way to punish one who has done you an injustice is to do him or her a kind deed in return.

People will always respond in kind, even in greater measure than that which is delivered to them. This commonplace need for retaliation can be replaced with a response designed to convert an enemy into a friend. If you get rid of the millstone of pride, you can respond to an injustice with a kind deed.

It may take time to make this work, but if you treat those who dislike you with unfailing kindness, they will eventually succumb to your influence and “retaliate” in kind.

As Napoleon Hill said, “The hottest coals of fire ever heaped upon the head of one who has wronged you are the coals of human kindness.”

There are few things in life that are as bad as they seem at first.

Dealing with adversity begins with analyzing and accepting your situation for what it is. When you realize that things are not nearly as bad as they might have been, you have taken the first step toward working your way through the problem. It is a truism that you will never be asked to carry a heavier load than you can bear, but it sometimes helps you better appreciate that fact if you volunteer some of your time to help those who are less fortunate than you are.

When adversity overtakes you, it pays to be thankful it was not worse instead of worrying over your misfortune.

The only constraints that you have on your income and advancement potential are those you place upon yourself. If you don’t like your position, or if you are unhappy with your salary, do something about it.

–What can you do to make yourself more valuable to your department or your company?

–What tasks have not been completed because no one has the time or the inclination to take care of them?

Look around and identify things that need to be done. Don’t wait to be asked. If you make it a habit to seek out opportunities, to take on new tasks, you will increase your knowledge about the organization and become such a valued employee that your company can’t afford to lose you.

Making life “easy” for children usually makes life “hard” for them in adulthood.

Del Smith, the millionaire founder and chairman of Evergreen International Aviation, has often said, “Thank God I was born poor; I learned how to work.” Like many others who made it to the top on their own, Smith believes that the greatest gift that can be given to a child is to teach him or her the value of work. It is a gift that can never be lost or stolen.

It’s a natural desire of parents to give their children material things they didn’t have as children. Such generosity, however, often deprives children of the greatest gift you can give them: confidence in their ability to take care of themselves. When you make life “hard” for your children by requiring them to learn the value of work, they will have a far greater likelihood of success as adults. The going is always hard on the road to greatness.

Anyone can quit when the going is hard, but a thoroughbred never quits until he wins. If success were easy, everyone would achieve it. NFL All-Pro lineman Brian Holloway recalled that when he was playing for the New England Patriots and the Los Angeles Raiders, there wasn’t a single day when he didn’t feel like giving up because the road was too tough and the sacrifices were too great. He didn’t quit, of course; he was willing to pay the price because he was determined to succeed.

True thoroughbreds never quit. Competition only spurs them, and obstacles merely reinforce their determination to succeed. If you have not yet achieved greatness in your life, it is because you have been willing to settle for less. You may not cross the finish line first every time you try, but if you stay in the race, you will eventually prevail. 

No man is ever whipped, until he quits — in his own mind.

Opportunity has a amazing way of finding the person who can recognize it and is ready to embrace it.

It is a curious quirk of human nature that some people can see opportunities, while others only see problems. When you train your mind to seek out opportunities, you will find that every day literally presents you with more opportunities than you can take advantage of. They will be all around you. Instead of your seeking opportunities, they will seek you out if you are patient. Your biggest problem will be choosing the best ones.

The first step in making sure you are ready to recognize opportunities when they occur is to make sure you have a clear understanding of your own core competencies. Realistically assess your strengths and weaknesses as though you were reviewing the credentials of a total stranger. Identify what areas you’re best in and those where you need improvement. Work on your weaknesses and build upon your strengths so that when you recognize opportunities you are prepared to capitalize upon them.

Drifting, without aim or purpose, is the first cause of failure.

Without a plan for your life, it is easier to follow the course of least resistance, to go with the flow, to drift with the current with no particular destination in mind. Having a definite plan for your life greatly simplifies the process of making hundreds of daily decisions that affect your ultimate success.

When you know where you want to go, you can quickly decide if your actions are moving you toward your goal or away from it. Without definite, precise goals and a plan for their achievement, each decision must be considered in a vacuum. Definiteness of purpose provides context and allows you to relate specific actions to your overall plan.

How can you judge others accurately if you have not learned to judge yourself accurately?

The ability to evaluate yourself and your performance objectively is critical to your relationships with others and will have an enormous impact upon the level of success you achieve during your lifetime. Unless you can honestly evaluate your strengths and weaknesses, how can you ever expect to improve your performance?

You must determine where you are before you can develop a plan to get you where you would like to be. If you were an independent, dispassionate observer, what advice would you give to yourself to improve your skills, your work habits, your interaction with others, and your contribution to the organization? Honesty about yourself is the first step toward self-improvement.

Hard work is commendable and required. But, work taken on the wrong path “is” what creates the response our body calls “stress”.  Stress and struggle are life’s guidelines, bouncing us from “off” course….to “on” course. Use the existence of stress in your life as a signal to take new actions along the path of life you “know” is right.  If stress reduces…. then full steam ahead!

Character is an important element of success and a critical attribute of leadership, but character alone cannot ensure success unless it is channeled in a positive direction. When good, decent people — persons of character — connect with a major purpose for their lives toward which they willingly and enthusiastically direct their energies, the results can be awe-inspiring. A major purpose and outstanding character are a formidable combination.

The subconscious mind makes no moral judgments.

If you tell yourself something over and over, your subconscious mind will eventually accept even the most blatant lie as fact. Those whose lives and careers have been destroyed by dishonest behavior began the process of self-destruction when they convinced themselves that one slight infraction of the rules wouldn’t matter.

When you sell yourself on an idea, make sure the idea is positive, beneficial to you, and harmless to others. Just as negative thoughts and deeds return to their originator, so do positive ones. When you practice honest, ethical behavior, you set in motion a force for good that will return to you many times over.

Failure is a blessing when it pushes us out of a cushioned seat of self-satisfaction and forces us to do something useful.

If you carefully study your own life and those of achievers whom you admire, it is an absolute certainty you will discover that your greatest opportunities often occurred during times of adversity. It is only when faced with the possibility of failure that we are willing to deal with radical change and take the risks that lead to great success. When you experience temporary failure and you know that it is temporary, you can capitalize on the opportunities adversity always brings.

It is a foregone conclusion that you will never reach great heights of success if you perform at high levels only when others are watching you. The most exacting standards of performance should be those you set for yourself, not those set by others for you. When your expectations for yourself are higher than your boss’s expectations for you, you will never have to worry about job security. If you work to your highest standards, the promotions will take care of themselves.

The person who works harder when the boss isn’t around is headed straight for a better job.

Faith is a combination of thoughts and actions.

When you apply your faith in yourself, your faith in your fellow man, and your faith in God, the result is a positive course of action that when persistently followed will almost always lead to success. When you believe in your ideas and in your abilities, and you trust in the Infinite Intelligence of the universe, you know that your thoughts and deeds will ultimately lead to a successful conclusion. You cannot fail.

Instead of complaining about what you don’t like, start commending what you do like and see how quickly life improves.

It’s easy to find fault in life. There are always some unpleasant and mundane tasks we would rather omit. It is also easy to allow the things we dislike to dominate our thoughts and to overlook the fact that the things we dislike are really a very small percentage of the life energy all around us.

Try this exercise . . . Make it a point to find something good, every day. It need not be a big, important event; simply finding joy in doing one thing particularly well will suffice. Then, instead of looking forward to the end of the day, you will find yourself actually looking forward to the hunt for your daily miracle!

The world pins no medals on you because of what you know, but it may crown you with glory and riches for what you do.

Knowledge is an important component of success in any field. To accomplish anything worthwhile often requires years of study. But knowledge alone is not power; it becomes powerful only when it is applied through positive action.

Study after study of successful people reveals that they have a bias for action. They gather the appropriate facts, relate them to their knowledge about the subject, develop an implementation plan, and then get into action. When in doubt, it’s far better to act too soon rather than too late.

Medals and titles will not count when you get to heaven, but you may be looked over carefully for the sort of deeds you have done.

It is a fundamental principle of many religions, that in the afterlife the only real measure of success will be how you have lived your life, not how much money you have accumulated. Whatever your faith may be, a good rule of everyday behavior is to live your life so that when it is over you can take pride in the knowledge that you have made a difference in the lives of those who have known you.

It’s easy in the crush of everyday life to lose sight of the true riches of life, the things that really matter. Psychologist Ilona Tobin defines true success as “giving and receiving love, having physical and mental health, enough wealth to provide you with options, and the time to enjoy them all.” Whatever your personal definition of success may be, make sure that it includes a healthy measure of the truly important things in life.

Your reputation is what people think you are; your character is what you are.

You want your reputation and your character to match, but concentrate on your character. You may be able to fool others about the kind of person you really are for a time, but it seldom lasts for long.

The surest way to make sure your character and your reputation are the same is to live your life in such a way that nothing you do would embarrass you if it were printed on the front page of the newspaper. Good character means not ever taking ethical shortcuts, even though everyone else may be doing so. You build good character by doing the right thing because it’s the right thing to do.

When considering a loan, a banker attaches great importance to three things: the borrower’s ability to repay the loan, the borrower’s credit history, and the borrower’s character. The first two considerations can be calculated mathematically; the third requires judgment and experience typically labeled – TRUSTWORTHY!

Bankers often lend money on character, but seldom on reputation alone, for they have learned that not all reputations are deserved.  Our character is rooted in our morals around honesty.  Its built on the fact that we either ARE or ARE  NOT honest! There is no sometimes…

Prudent bankers have learned that persons of character are always a good risk because they take their obligations seriously while those who spend their resources on the trappings of success should be avoided at all costs.

Protect your good reputation as you would protect your home, your investments, and your life. Once shattered, a good reputation can only be regained by those who have developed the courage and willpower to persevere in the face of great odds.

If others are not providing you the trust that you desire….look in the mirror and ask yourself. “Am I living every moment with trustworthy integrity”

Most of us at one time or another have been misunderstood by those who are important to us. They thought we planned to take an action they disliked when in truth our intentions were to proceed in an entirely different direction. Such misunderstandings are usually quickly righted and life goes on. The same is true with character and reputation.

If your reputation is for some reason misaligned with your character, it will soon quickly right itself when others discover for themselves that you are not at all the kind of person they had assumed you were. If your foundation is strong, you never need to be concerned about such misunderstandings. Others will learn soon enough what kind of person you really are. Spend your time and energy in constant self-inspection and self-improvement, building strong character, and you will never have to worry about what others think of you.

You may think that no one is watching…but they ARE!

Financial wealth is only one measure of success.

The truly happy and successful individual is the man or woman who is healthy, financially secure, challenged in his or her career, and is making a difference in the lives of others. It isn’t always easy to render service to others. The world is a cynical and dangerous place where others are likely to mistrust your motives. They can be convinced only by consistent, sustained, outstanding service that is enthusiastically and cheerfully offered. In time, even the most cynical individual will come to accept your willingness to go the extra mile if you are sincere in your offers of assistance and in the service you provide.

It’s easy to find fault with any job. Whatever your occupation or profession, there are always some unpleasant and mundane tasks you would rather omit. It is also easy to allow the things you dislike to dominate your thoughts and for you to overlook the fact that the things you dislike about your work are really a very small percentage of the overall job. Make it a point to find something good in your job every day. It need not be a big, important event; simply finding joy in doing one thing particularly well will suffice. Then, instead of looking forward to the end of the day, you will find yourself actually looking forward to going to work.

Instead of complaining about what you don’t like about your job, start commending what you do like and see how quickly it improves.